Sort of peaceful

Things are getting easier thank God! Thursday I dose down to 5mg./day. I am somewhat apprehensive, but then again I have been apprehensive about all of dose downs. Yes I suffered through all og=f them to a certain extent. I guess I am just going to enjoy the next day while I have it. I'm sleeping!! Both at night and taking a nap. This is huge. I also had watched an hour of television which is a great leap. Before, I was tied to my keyboard during my spare time. My computer suffered a major wound today and I spent a lot of time on damage control. I was barraged by 17 trojan horses and other nasty things. Norton, my computer protection, was totally oblivious to the whole nightmare. I am a photographer and I have all of my photos on my computer. I wasn't able to access them. Fortunately, Kodak bailed me out; God bless 'em. I am sort of nervous, but somewhat at peace at the same time. I hope that I will find myself in this place 2 weeks from now. God willing, I will. 2 weeks. When I quit smoking, I was told the nic fits would only last for 2 weeks. 2 weeks came and went; I still was having nic fits. I told myself that I would give it 1 more week and if I was still miserable, I would go back to smoking. The third week came and the severe fits were gone. I made it cold turkey. I withstood and won. Thanks to Jesus. It is nearly 23:00 and I am getting a little squeemish, but this too will pass. One day at a time. One song at a time. One minute at a time. Yes, I am afraid. What will 2 weeks of no Methadone feel like? One week? One day? One month? I thinkthat writing about it all may help me through it. I hope someone who has gone through this proccess will talk to me. I need info. I am starting to become drowsy from the Ambien now. Blessed sleep. Well Scott if you have read this, thank you. Even my good friend Jim won't bother reading this. a counselor at the drop-in center whom I hardly even know takes interest in me. Well, that's how life goes on. One of my favorite quotes which I deem worthy of repeating: "New born eyes always cry with pain." - Chris Rea. God Bless

Keep on keepin' on

1:40a.m. having difficulty in sleeping. Just broke down and popped open a cherry Coke. I am not having a lot of fun now. I have been worse. It has been approx. 40 days and I had one five day set back. No one's perfect. Except Jesus. I am still at ten mg. soon to be 5. This oughta be a hoot. Oh joy. I am pacing myself a little faster than normal with the exception of the extra five days I needed due to a mistake on my part. I am tired of feeling crappy. There are and have been much harder come downs. One Dr. suggested doing this over a year's period of time. There my muscles in my legs go again. All antsy. Today (rather yesterday) was the last time I met with a group of chronic pain patients. It was a ten week commitment which flew by. I wish that I felt better. You can wish in one hand and.... I don't know if writing about it is the right thing to do or not; at least it can as a pressure cooked being relieved of Its pent up steam. Now my sleep meds are kicking in; I need sleep. Goodnight everyone and ecpecially Scott and Don (they know whom they are). Thank you everyone for your support. - Eric